One Belongs to New York Instantly

The 20-Something Midlife Crisis

Sun, 19 May 2013 22:29:25 -0400

Like most mental health crisis, I’d thought I was the only one afflicted.

Unique to my situation, I also thought that New York City was playing a heavy hand in it, and only some people people in my circumstances wouldn’t understand the city’s influence.

In both ways I was wrong.

It started in two ways: one because I was waking up in the morning feeling constricted and two because I began to read a lot of Hemingway and Fitzgerald.

I didn’t read Hem and Fitz BECAUSE I felt myself loosening, I realized I was loosening because of the literature. I felt the Green Light of my ambition and career goals-my ultimate fulfillment-in the distance. But like Gatsby on the other side, I wasn’t sure how to achieve it. I was throwing around these temporary solutions like he was throwing grand parties, and ultimately, Daisy wasn’t walking through the door.

On one hand, I felt very sure of myself in regards to my chosen profession. I’m lucky that I feel fulfilled by social work, because it’s one of the only things I’m innately good at. If I felt like I might be fulfilled by being a surgeon I’d be screwed: that kind of thing would be lost on me. And raise your hand if you’d want me operating on you in the future (yea, I didn’t think so).

On the other hand, I didn’t feel fulfilled by what I was doing. I was tired, more tired than I’d been in a long time. That thrill and challenge I was used to feeling with my clients, and have written about here, was gone. I was going out less during the week, and going out too much on the weekends. I wasn’t producing creatively. It was as if I was stitched up at the sides, and those threads were loosening, allowing everything important inside to spill out.

If I was sure about my career path, than what was happening to me?

When I read the works aforementioned, I read about people who made choices because they FELT like it, because they WANTED to. Even if they didn’t have enough money, even if they didn’t know what might happen if they made a certain choice. There was a definite allure emerging in the idea of doing things based on urges or desire. How long had it been since I’d done something like that? Made a big decision, or really any decision at all, just because I wanted to? (Buying that box of Oreos at Gristedes and texting my ex not withstanding).

Speaking of which, my personal life also left some to be desired. Here in 1920s literature were examples of couples loving fiercely and hard. Neither party contemplating what it might be like to divorce, or worrying about financial stability or whether or not their friends liked either of them. Here I was barely able to digest the anxiety caused by online dating, and marking yet another tally for the side of my scoreboard that read “Relationship Ended In Me Feeling Like Shit,” while the boards labeled “Satisfying/Successful” or “Just Fizzled/Not Successful” were left relatively blank.

Alison encouraged me to remember that the grass is always greener. Which, I had been doing my best to remind myself. While none would doubt the romantic ASPECTS of Zelda and Scott, Ernest and Hadley, one might admit they wouldn’t want to be a PERSON in either of those relationships. The Fitzgerald’s spent most of their time as broke alcoholics, and Hemingway had failed marriage after failed marriage until he ended his own life after lifetime bouts with depression. Sure, both couples lived in Paris during the Jazz Age (in shitty, low rent apartments). Sure, both women were married to literary geniuses and are now immortal figures (but who cares if their mortal lives, the ones they experienced, were miserable due to ill treatment by their so-called partners?)

So there were definite cons to just acting on a whim. But something had to give. I couldn’t stand at the end of this dock anymore pretending I wasn’t interested on what was on the other side.

I tentatively expressed my feelings to friends all around the country. I expected to be reminded of how alone I was in my dissatisfaction. I was surprised to see a pattern emerging, so much so that when I shared it with my aunt she agreed as if she’d known all along.

The Twenty-Something Life Crisis has been going on for years. Possibly even centuries.

There’s a tug and pull between what your body and your newness can provide, and what your life knowledge allows you. It is a cruel truth, I’m learning, that while us twenty-somethings are at our physical and mental prime, we’re also the least prepared for what we’re engaging in. Hence the reason we so often feel like we’re “playing” adult: because we are.

What do I really know about filing taxes, holding a professional job or maintaining an on-going relationship? (So far, call dad, show up on time and choose someone different than before). Everything we’ve learned is like training wheels, especially for those of us in college. College is a mile stone because it is life with training wheels. It gives you some exposure, but you can’t ride a two-wheeler until the training wheels are removed and then, shit, what now? You’d felt so sure on four wheels, and now that you’re on two you realize what you’ve learned isn’t keeping you from riding down the street all wobbly.

I often worry that I’ll be in my 30s and 40s and look back at my 20s thinking, “What a waste.” I had the best body, the best and freshest opportunities, I was physically fit, at the height of my life’s education, but because I was still learning life lessons; not able to enjoy a minute of it.

I am constantly plagued by insecurities: Mostly related to my physical appearance, failed relationships and career.

Constantly I wonder whether or not I look or feel fat, whether anyone on the train can tell I haven’t washed my hair in two days, whether or not that boy/man finds me attractive. Constantly I wonder if I’m destined to die alone, if I shouldn’t just relax and give in to that nice guy, why I let that one guy get me down for as long as he did, forgetting how able and smart I am and let the guy with the “Bad Boy” resume take me out, torturing myself when it doesn’t work out. Constantly I wonder if I’m making enough money, as much money as my friends, enough money to pay my bills in the most expensive city in the world, if this is what I want to do, if I’m any good at it, if maybe someone else would do it better, if I’ll ever feel like an expert in my field.

My father and aunt (along with most objective third parties) tell me to JUST RELAX. I know that years from now, I will have wished I’d done that more. But that’s part of the Twenty Something Crisis: you can’t. Without years lived, I have fewer chances to rely on past experiences that have worked out. When everything seems out of my control, how can I just relax and be sure that if it’s going to work out, it will?

I was surprised to learn that nearly all of my friends in their twenties felt the same way. Their futures were unsure as well, in nearly all the ways that mine are. It manifested itself in different ways, one friend was questioning her entire field of work, another felt drowned by future insecurity, another unsure of an on-going relationship failing to fall in tandem with her successful career.

A unique female trait is that we also tend to doubt ourselves: maybe it’s US. We’re not good enough, we don’t work hard enough, love hard enough, take good enough care of our bodies.

I wish that I could end this with a hunky-dory How To about what steps I took to come through my Crisis, but I still feel very much in the midst of it.

I’m still reading Fitz and Hem too, and I still feel the same way about gut decisions now as I did last year when I started reading.

But there were a few things that I was able to remind myself that have helped, so I’ll share them in hopes that maybe another Twenty Something can add them to their arsenal.

1. If You’re Not Happy, Find Out What Makes You Happy

This is certainly easier said than done. Maybe you think you know, but you aren’t sure. I found it helped me to think about my unhappy moments in order to determine when I was happy.

For me I knew that I didn’t like filling out government paperwork or direct service provision as much as I liked one-on-one counseling or crisis work (ironic, right?) For me, this allowed me to learn that counseling and crisis work, something I’d once thought wasn’t a career goal, really was. That’s what makes me happy/professional-personally fulfilled.

Also, writing makes me happy. Thing Number Two that I’ve been born innately good at. (Don’t get jealous, the list is only two things long). I was writing less. I assumed because I was so emotionally drained in other areas. My ability to create was being stifled.

If you’re not sure what makes you happy, don’t stress. Most people take lots of time to determine this, and being happy isn’t something that’s sustained, it’s something you have to work at. Just take note of the moments you feel happy, and keep track. Journaling, I hear, is a good way of giving yourself a personal record of your Happy Journey.

2. Once You Know What Makes You Happy, Pursue It.

Since the hard part of deciding what makes me happy was over, I knew that I needed to take active steps to be that way.

Of course there’s a level of Realism applied to this stage.

It would make me happy to live in a loft in SOHO with an all black Range Rover. But I can’t afford those things, nor are they as important as some other immediate goals.

My mental health was first, as were reaching my career goals.

So I made the decision to actively persue my social work licensure. Being licensed would give me the ability to counsel one-on-one again. I also enrolled in writing courses in the city, giving myself a concentrated time to be creative again.

If you’re not sure what to do with your happiness kernel, do some reasearch. If you’ve considered going back to school in a particular area, reach out to friends and family that have done that. Then research programs. How much does it cost? Can you work through a program? What doors does it open? Where do you want to be and ultimately what do you want to do? Research may give you some further insight into your next steps.

3. Eat Healthy and Exercise

This one is so much easier said than done. For me, it is a daily struggle. I love how I feel after I work out, and eating healthy (thankfully) has been instilled in me my whole life. But I live in New York, where gym memberships are hundreds of dollars a month, the parks are rape grounds after dark, and it’s easier to get something delivered than it is to count to ten.

I’ve found however, that when I do these things, I worry less about what I look like. Negative thought processes about my body, and the changes its gone through as I’ve gotten older are a never ending battle. Surrounding myself with positive people has also helped me work through that (Alison reminds me almost every other day that for the hundredth time, it’s not normal to be the same weight you were senior year of high school so shut up). Those people also can commiserate that yes, that model does look pretty and skinny (so you know you’re not crazy) before they go on to the aforementioned snapoutofit.

When you know you’re taking care of your body the best you can, the rest of it you can chalk up to genes, God’s graces, and let it go.

4. Feed Your Mind/Soul

For me, I’ve always been a creative person. In the most literal sense: I love to write, take photos, paint, etc. Seeing movies, attending concerts and listening to music are also important to me. Unfortunately I don’t do these things everyday, and even less often when I’m feeling down in the dumps or overwhelmed. Which seems strange, considering these things tend to keep me so centered, it’s when I feel LEAST centered that I let them fall away.

Being creative and having an outlet is something you have to work for. My aunt has always told me that if you REALLY want something, you’ll have it: you’ll make time, you’ll save money, you’ll learn, etc. If you don’t do those things, then you really don’t want it as bad as you think. Most of the time I think this is true.

If you want a creative outlet, you need to work for it. It’s probably something you’re already interested in/good at, so it’s really just a matter of finding time.

You can do what I did and create a formal time (attending a class, going to a concert, etc.) or you can just give yourself personal goals (For example: this week I will work on my screenplay for 30 mins). You REALLY don’t have 30 mins? If you’re anything like me, my guess is you definitely would if you turned off the TV/computer, and tuned into yourself. I often write while I watch TV….(is that cheating?)

5. Remind Yourself Of What’s Good

Twenty Somethings have to remind themselves that this is an on-going exercise. You’ll probably never stop doing it, which is a good thing. It’s a life lesson we learn from a young age: Be thankful for what you have.

But that saying has new meaning when you live as an adult for the first time in your twenties, because the reality is that you really just don’t have much. Especially for my fellow TwentySomethings who live in a city where it’s a million dollars to breathe the air.

It’s so easy to count the things that are the Big Suck: the plaster hole in our bathroom ceiling (for two years running), our boyfriend-less existence (make that healthy relationship-less existence), our lack of perfect bodies (less visible if we suck in like this), lack of furry companion (possible impulse pet buy coming up).

Yet I’m lucky to have many opportunities through out the week that help remind me how lucky I truly am. Just yesterday as I trudged up the dirty stairs of our building wondering why it always looks so shoddy, I knew how lucky we really are to live in Manhattan at all. So many people only dream of being a part of NYC, and we’re a part of it every day. I don’t have to worry where my rent money is coming from, or that I’ll have a place to sleep at night. That’s much more than other people can say, and for that I am thankful.

When I run along the reservoir and can see the skyline lit up by the water, the trees in Spring green, making shh-ing sounds in the wind: I live in New York City. It fills me like a deep breath, the realization that despite it all I know I am happy where I’m at. That’s something too: most twenty somethings are saving money to be where they want to be, or only dreaming about it. Alison and I are lucky to have that crossed off the list already at such a young age. People (and some I know personally) sell their soul to live in Manhattan. There’s so much that sucks about living in a big city, but I still feel like it lives up to all the hype.

I have a career path I’m sure of (even though I’m not sure how I’ll get there), I have a family that supports me, I have friends that love me, I have an open heart and a hopeful soul (anticipating there is a man that one day will want to love me), I have my health (something I’ve learned through painful lessons is always a good thing), and a hopeful future: because (oh yeah) I’m only twenty-four.

That’s a lot of good for one person.

I’m hopeful that my Crisis will be averted naturally as I leave my twenties and enter the more practiced zone of Thirty-Something. Luckily I’ll have some old geezer friends to prep me for whether or not this is true.
In the mean time, I say, much like a Twenty Something Optimus Prime: You are not alone, we’re out there. Meaning: you’re not the only floundering twenty something.

And—you have to trust in the knowledge you’ll gain. It’s going to come, and if it doesn’t, you’ll search it out. If your present in your life, we have to be half way there right? Lean on your team members, who ever they are. Even if you shoot a basket on the wrong side of the court you’re still playing the game.

Don’t let this keep you from Fitzgerald and Hemingway, either. Those books will make you feel young in a good way. It is so very good to be young after all.

(By the way, that photo is of my friend Val and I in Paris, Val, I want to note, is not having a midlife crisis, neither of us is enjoying the Cafe Creme.)

Happy Festivus (whatever your holiday is) from us here at New...

Wed, 19 Dec 2012 21:28:14 -0500

Happy Festivus (whatever your holiday is) from us here at New York Instant!

XXOO

5A's (NY Mag) Year in Culture

Fri, 14 Dec 2012 16:13:00 -0500

This week, New York Magazine’s “Year in Culture” hit news stands. As culturally diverse women, Alison and I of Apartment 5A believe it is our duty as NYC bloggers to respond to the article, which broke up culture into (somewhat) distinct categories: Music, Movies, Art, Theatre, and TV.

We know about that shit.

So here’s what we had to say about each category, including a wish list of things we have yet to see and experience. An Agree means we agreed with NYMag’s assessment, and a Disagree means, well, you get it…
Without a Ag/Dis means we’ve just decided to add it, or the category entirely.
It helps to have the magazine article handy, but we’re pretty sure you’re going to enjoy our list no matter what…

MOVIES

BEST OF THE YEAR

Friends with Kids
AGREE
Written by Jennifer Westfeldt (Jon Hamm’s real life wifey), this movie tells the story of two adult friends who decide to have a child together. The story is laugh out loud and it also breaks your heart, but mostly it’s delightfully real. A good choice for a date movie you’ll both actually enjoy.

Perks of Being a Wallflower
More on this book in a little. Even though the trailer is nauseatingly “You’re so unique! Go for your dreams!” the movie itself is a grand exploration of what it’s like to be young when your life is being impacted by situations out of your control. The story tackles serious issues from domestic abuse to sexual molestation, but it never for a moment feels contrived or preachy. The three leading stars are likely to thank for that, as well as the book’s author writing the screen play.

Most Honorable Failures

Anna Karenina
Disagree
Sure, Alison slept through the last 40 minutes (maybe an hour, but who’s counting?) but the movie itself was still good for two reasons. One, it’s shot on a stage, literally. The actors and actresses move from room to room while the sets are being removed behind them, and emotions are conveyed through stage lighting. The concept works, and it looks amazing. (Well, the whole movie looks amazing. The costuming and set design will likely see Oscar nods). And as much as we here in 5A are on the fence about Keira Knightley, we have to give her props for choosing challenging roles and giving them her all. She’s a good choice for Anna, and does the part justice.

The Campaign
Agree
This shit was mean spirited and not funny. Devastating considering its potential.

Best Channing Tatum Movie of 2012
Agree
“21 Jump Street” It was funny, even NY Mag readers laughed.

Two Movies with Matthew McConaughey That Are Horribly Violent and Horribly Interesting

Killer Joe
When Emile Hirsch’s character owes money to a few small town thugs, he devises an ill conceived plan with his stepfather to have a family member murdered by Killer Joe, Matthew M. in a role that is pure brute force. When Hirsch can’t come through with payment, Killer Joe takes possession of his young Lolita-ish sister. The whole movie will make you cringe, but nothing quite like the final scene. The man behind me in the ticket line tried to warn me, and I brushed him off. But trust me, you’ve never seen violence done quite this way.

The Paperboy
A role that will finally set Zac Efron apart from his sugary romantic past. Efron is reporter who falls in love with Nicole Kidman’s Southern train wreck of a character, who is helping research her incarcerated fiance’s crime. John Cusack plays the fiance, and he alone is a chilling figure. Add Matthew M. who plays Efron’s sexually closeted brother taking the case by storm and you have a strange story that will stay with you long after the credits roll. Oh and there’s plenty of anal rape and murder to satisfy every freak in the audience.

TELEVISION

Girls
NY Mag had a whole article dedicated to the “Undulating Curve of Lena Dunham.” It outlines the back lash and back from back lash “Girls” received in its ground breaking first season. Sure, most of the starring cast has famous parents. The characters are “spoon fed brats.”
Whatever.
Here’s five simple reasons why “Girls” is easily a top three show in 5A:

1. It’s real in the ways that matter. The girls are fat. The girls are broke. The girls live in Brooklyn.
2. The girl’s relationships are shit.
3. Adam.
4. Pregnancy scares are no joke. When you’re friend calls you and says, “Holy Shit” you drop everything and schedule her abortion. You don’t wax poetic about what it might be like to be a mom with your bestest pals. Looking at you Carrie…
5. Getting a job is hard and your parents just don’t understand.

Best quote to summarize the show’s similarity to real twenty-something’s lives? “Oh you’re embarrassed by this? Well that’s because it’s really embarrassing.”

~~NY Mag’s Kids~~ 5A’s Girls of the Year

Cara Delevingne
Sure she’s the skinniest bitch on the block. But she’s got the fiercest eyebrows, two of our favorite designer’s campaigns under her belt (ahem Burberry ahem Chanel) and she seems like she wants to laugh. We want to laugh all the time.

Jennifer Lawrence
She grew up in Kentucky. We’re from Indiana. Through six degrees of (actually pretty legit) separation we basically already know her. Sometimes she’s a little bit too tomboy for our taste, but if you ask Alison sometimes I’m that way too. Oh yea, she chooses good roles.

Rhianna
Sure her Instagram is a train wreck. But we LOVE to hate this girl, and we (not so secretly) love her fearlessness. There has to be respect for a woman who has no qualms about baring her breasts, her formerly abusive boyfriend and her tattoos in memory of her grandmother (wait, ironic?) for the whole world to see. You Go RiRi.

Emma Watson
Her style and her short hair make us wish we were her. Her English accent makes us wish we were her. Her performance in “Perks” made us wish we were her. Sometimes we imagine we are her.

Demi Lovato
Someone give this woman an award for bouncing back from her lowest point to have a legit career spurred on by her legit talent. When Lindsay Lohan goes crazy everyone just rolls their eyes and wishes she’d go to jail. When Demi announced she was back, everyone heard her fierce new singles and saw her rocking pink blonde hair and thought, wait she was even gone?

MUSIC

We each chose 5 songs together that we’ve been loving in 2012.

“Big Blue Wave” by Hey Ocean!
Best Line: No I don’t want to fuss or fight, and I’m not one to give advice…sing until you float away, our love is like a big blue wave

“The Zone” by the Weeknd
Best Line: (even though it’s in Drake’s solo) Sit your sexy ass on that couch, wipe that lip stick off your mouth, let’s take it slow

“Break the Day Open” by Benjamin Francis Leftwich
This Brit is about the get the recognition he deserves after getting a shout out from Ed Sheeran the other day. His EP boasts soft melodies and subtly smart lyrics.

“Take Care” cover by Conor Maynard
His debut album “Contrast” came out this year (and I met him in September), but this newly 20 year old star has a brilliant voice that shines best on his cover of Drake and RiRi’s “Take Care.”

“Radioactive” by Imagine Dragons
Best Line: I’m waking up to action dust, I wipe my brow and I sweat my rust, I’m breathing in the chemicals.

“Don’t Let it Break Your Heart” by Coldplay
Best line: When you’re tired of aiming your arrows, still you never hit the mark, even in your rain and shadows, still we’re never going to part

“Home” by Phillip Phillips
Finally, an American Idol winner whose music you can download without the attached guilt. Not to mention a double name..?

“As Long As You Love Me” by Justin Bieber
Sure, laugh. But this song marks Justin’s official transition from boyhood to enduring pop phenomenon, much the way Britney did (more on that later). The bomb ass video is just an added bonus.

“Warzone” by the Wanted
Definitely a guilty pleasure in 5A this summer. But lets call a spade a spade (as Alison likes to say) and admit this is the only boy band on the market right now singing about ADULT topics and blasting at the club.

Song of the Year

“Everything is Embarrassing” by Sky Ferreira
Agree
Any song that makes you want to dance like Carlton has our vote. Not to mention, NY Mag takes a paragraph to artfully explain the following: it has just enough pop to be catchy, and just enough emo to make you still feel cool listening to it.

Pop Music’s Good and Bad
TOTALLY Disagree (NY Mag had these listed under the opposite categories).

The Good

Most Enduring Pop Phenomenon: Lana Del Rey
Lana’s voice isn’t supposed to bring down the opera house. I’m pretty sure after all this time we can conclude that her raspy monotone is MEANT to sound that way. Sure she sounded like shit on SNL, but her music is still interesting, her look is still fresh and let’s not point the finger about sounding poor live (look below).

Most Deserving Pop Blockbuster: Mumford and Sons
When bands that play musical instruments, write their own material and have lead singers with strong vocals emerge, everyone runs around stating the obvious—how good they are. But that’s the point. We should be celebrating groups with that level of talent, and Mumford has it. (Plus he’s married to Carey Mulligan and we love her.)

The Bad

Least Enduring Pop Phenomenon: Taylor Swift
Here in Apt 5A we are pro-woman, which is why we hate TSwift. When you have a series of failed relationships, you look inward at the only consistency: YOURSELF. Taylor has yet to realize this, and doesn’t help generations of young women idolizing her to do that either. Besides, no female is that nice. Besides she is dating Harry Styles. Besides she doesn’t sound that great live either.

Least Deserving Pop Blockbuster: Carly Rae Jepsen’s “Call Me Maybe”
Find one person who says they legit like this song and I’ll show you a liar. Do you want to be 28 years old making music like this? Scratch that, do you want to be making music like this? (Your answer better be no).

~~NY Mags Best Music Combacks~~ Best Move with the Music Times

Good
Britney Spears
Britney knows that she is not a great singer. So she does the smart thing and makes music that fits into the moment’s popular mold. (Right now that’s pop-y dubstep, hence “Scream and Shout.”) When you make music that’s going to get played, you’re going to be a successful artist. (Notice I didn’t say musician, but that’s not the point). Britney knows what she has to work with, and she’s a great performer. She reads the trends and interprets them in a way that makes me dance at the club. What else can we ask for?

Bad
Christina Aguilera
It pains us here in 5A to say this, but the truth must be spoken aloud. Christina knows that she’s a great singer, so she makes absolutely no effort to mold her voice to the popular trends because they don’t do her voice any justice. The problem with that is there’s no longer any niche for her sound. Which is a shame, because XTina paved the way for RiRi/Lana D. and (dare I say it) Gaga. Christina was the first to wear assless chaps and shock the world with her brazen attitude and song lyrics. But now she refuses to adapt and we know what happens to the animals that don’t adapt. They go extinct.

ART

Apt 5A’s favorite exhibits on display in NYC in 2012, neither of which were featured in NY Mag.

Prada and Schiaparelli: Impossible Conversations at the Metropolitan Museum of Art
Simply beautiful designs made easily digestible in an elegantly designed space.

Yayoi Kusama at the Whitney
Kusama’s return to the artworld was marked by this striking and nearly fifty year spanning exhibit at the Whitney, as well as her designs for Louis Vuitton.

Books (None of which are featured in NY Mag)

Best of the Year (Even if they aren’t 2012 titles)

Bright Lights Big City by Jay McInerney
A young male professional in NYC is disillusioned with his life, and just before the story seems like you’ve been there, read that, it reminds you what we’re all really looking for when our lives seem meaningless.
Wettest County in the World (now published as Lawless) by Matthew Bondurant
A true story of three bootlegging brothers that is so painstakingly researched to ensure its real-ness it practically gets up and walks around the room. One of the most gruesome scenes I’ve ever read in a book, and it has nothing to do with humans, but rather the birth of a deformed cow.
Hunger Games series by Suzanne Collins
Brought back to light in 2012 with the release of the movies, you can’t help but deny that this shit is good.

Most Overrated of 2012 (and Brought Back in ‘12)

Turn of the Mind by Alice LaPlante
Don’t you hate when the culprit in a murder mystery turns out to be the red herring? Don’t worry, I didn’t ruin it, I just saved you time and money

Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chobsky
It’s rare that a movie is better than the book that created it. But here’s an instance where the translation to screen eliminated what didn’t work in print.

Most Underrated Book of 2012

Nowhere But Up by Patti Mallette
I didn’t throw up AND I’d recommend it to a client. Seems like it wasn’t all bad…

Best Magazines of 2012 (How did NY Mag forget mags?!)
Vogue
People SAY they read Vogue, but they don’t. That’s because you haven’t reached a point where you care about fashion and journalism as equal art forms. When you do, how delicious Vogue truly is…

Nylon
It’s easy to love a magazine that has equal parts fashion, unique-ness and graphic design well covered (and none of them makes you gag).

WISH LIST (Things NY Mag listed that we just haven’t got our paws on yet!)

Zero Dark Thirty
Listed as best movie of the year. Def has the potential, since director of the Hurt Locker, Jessica Chastain and an intriguiging plot are all playing for the same team.

Once
The indie musical that NY Mag calls “twee and pulls it off” is on Alison’s Must-See list.

Death of a Salesman
Philip Seymour Hoffman plays the lead in this classic tale of human desire/worth/whatever other adjectives make you feel like we respect the material. On Wynne’s Must-See list.

Kendrick Lamar’s, Good Kid, m.A.A.d City
If a rap album is revered by NY Mag it MUST be good.

So there you have it, culture as interpreted by 5A and inspired by NY Mag!
What moments of 2012 culture do you think we forgot? Which were your favorites? Let us know at NewYorkInstant@gmail.com

tonyj-nightowl: The cold night is on its way. Foggy and cold...

Mon, 10 Dec 2012 20:04:48 -0500

tonyj-nightowl:

The cold night is on its way.

Foggy and cold in NYC again tonight, this is a beautiful shot by another Tumblr-er.

NYC.

Sat, 08 Dec 2012 11:31:01 -0500

NYC.

Jason and I went to Brighton Beach (Coney Island) last January...

Wed, 05 Dec 2012 21:23:54 -0500

Jason and I went to Brighton Beach (Coney Island) last January (almost a year ago!) This area has since been seriously affected by Hurricane Sandy. It’s one of my favorite pictures and it’s almost been a year since we took it.

Alison and I at a friend’s Union Square apartment in...

Wed, 05 Dec 2012 21:21:41 -0500

Alison and I at a friend’s Union Square apartment in August (missing those warm weather clothes).

Alison is in a Free People top (pajamas fashioned as a tank), H&M shorts and Vince Camuto heels. I am wearing an H&M dress with Aldo wedges.

In July, I took my friend Chris to see Time’s Square for...

Wed, 05 Dec 2012 21:19:53 -0500

In July, I took my friend Chris to see Time’s Square for (his) first time.

Anytime I find an Indiana reference in a fashion blog, I know I...

Mon, 03 Dec 2012 21:46:41 -0500

Anytime I find an Indiana reference in a fashion blog, I know I gotta spread the love.

Sandra.

Tue, 30 Oct 2012 12:48:00 -0400

Lower Manhattan’s black out. (Photo courtesy of CBS).

Last September I sat in my bed (that was on the other side of the room back then), and called Alison. Was she on her way home? This Irene nonsense was starting to get a little intense. If we were going to float out of our apartment I fully intended to do it partner style. I bought groceries, I filled up our tub and our pasta pot with water and sat waiting.

I waited for awhile. It rained, Alison came home a few hours later none the wiser. I heard a few stories of NYU classmates who lived in Jersey that hadn’t had their electricity restored for a few weeks. That had to have been the big suck. Up on the UES we were A-Okay, barely a rain storm to contend with.

When the news started to talk about the “Frankenstorm” this time around images of ‘The Perfect Storm’ and standing on my fire escape shouting, “C’mon you bitch!!” came to mind. But certainly nothing too serious. I picked up a few essentials (peanut butter, Cheetos, pumpkin donuts because I was curious what they might be like, bread, a can of soup) and filled the tub, sitting back to text Jason again about what a lame-o he was. Jason decided to flee the city this weekend concerned that his apartment’s nearness to water had somehow threatened him. That’s sarcasm, and for the past few days we have been in a text battle back and forth trying to “right” the other one.

I’ll give it to Myles, Hurricane Sandy was a little more intense. While it didn’t rain up in our hood too much, leaves scattered in the wind, littering the empty streets. Lower Manhattan is flooded, and public transit is out due to severe flooding. (That photo of Hoboken’s train station is a little too Titanic for my taste.) Some of our friends have lost power, but everyone is surviving. Maybe I’ll venture down to York to check out what’s going on, take some pictures. Last night Alison and I left the apartment to go to 7-11 with her work friend Kim, and we were happy to see NYC living up to its good name. Every bar on 3rd was open and had people inside drinking and shouting at the Monday night football broadcast. We bought a wedge of brie, ten dollars worth of granola bars and went home to finish an HBO show in my bed.

Hats off to the police that were patrolling the streets last night, as well as the rescue workers who were putting out fires in Chelsea and hospital employees who rescued 20 babies from NYU’s Lagone. How awesome would it be to be on of those surviving babies? The city’s pretty awesome when it wants to be. Which is about 83.5% of the time, my surveys say.

We might just make it. Two hurricanes down, however many more to go.

Brand New Barclays, Jay

Wed, 10 Oct 2012 21:54:58 -0400

A few weeks ago, New York Magazine ran the headline: “Brooklyn is Over.” Or maybe it was, the writer wondered, thanks to the plunk down of the architectural behemouth, Barclays Center. (Among other things its been called.)

Regardless of any ethical dilemmas Barclays suggests, (of which I am not qualified to comment on,) I have to say I’m not sure the Center is set to ruin the hipster idyllic Brooklyn still imagines it is. I’ve been multiple times to the Brooklyn Flea, where I’ve tasted the organic apple butter, drank the pear juice soda and purchased the vintage records that now hang in our living room. But I wouldn’t say I define the Brooklyn neighborhood this way, anymore than I would consider all of Manhattan to be like SOHO.

The rap artist Jay-Z headlined 8 shows at Barclays Center, home of the Brooklyn Nets (of which he is 1% owner). I attended the 10/3 show with Alison and friends. And I enjoyed myself, okay Brooklyn? Barclays is just like any other arena venue with $15 Bud Lights and shiny cement floors. It was Jay-Z’s stripped down, two hour set that mde the night memorable. With nothing but a microphone, his band, light work and a puffy vest. He performed the hits (I was pleasantly surprised to know almost all). Annnd Jay played up the New York connection, asking multiple times “Brooklyn where we at tonight?” and at one point shouting out his original Lexington address. Cool for us New Yorkers. The set was high energy, fun and easy to see—even from what seemed very far away.

When I was in high school, Deer Creek, an outdoor music center in Noblesville, Indiana was bought by Verizon Wireless. It was, as you probably guessed, renamed the Verizon Wireless Music Center. Everyone was up in arms about the commercialism of it all. But many years later, we’re all calling it Verizon, and the venue still works and the great acts still come.

It was the summer before my second year of college. I was 19 and still blonde when I saw Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers at Verizon. To my knowledge, he plays there every year, and to those of you unaware, Tomy Petty is to IN as Jay-Z is to BK. My sister Kelly and friend Ali and I drove up to the venue, slugged vodka in the parking lot and watched Petty and his band play as the sun set.

I can remember walking up the grassy hill towards my friends, the alcohol covering me in the delicious way a good buzz can, the illicit thrill of being drunk and underage pulsing through my limbs. As Petty sang, “them Indiana boys on an Indiana night,” I felt transcendent. My denim cut offs and mud-stained feet validated by a rock star. I felt the same way last Wednesday as Jay-Z rapped “Empire State of Mind,” lyrics, “these streets will make you feel brand new, these lights will inspire you.” Alison threw her arm around me as we celebrated the city that rebuilt us, the white wine in our hearts finally purchased legally. Neither experience was changed by Barclays or Verizon, of that I am very qualified to say.

Tim, Alison, Me, unfortunate BK outfit

Almost Famous

Thu, 13 Sep 2012 23:50:00 -0400

I’ve been listening to an English guy’s covers on You Tube since last winter. I had the privilege of sharing his talents with some friends, especially this summer when I went to Paris and London. All the ladies loved Conor Maynard’s (English guy in question) music and before I knew it I was back on American soil and in Conor’s arms. Well, it didn’t exactly work like that, but you get the idea.

(He’s holding his autograph, upon which I’d written a hello for my friend Meg, who is also a fan). That’s the great thing about New York. One minute you’re sitting around after your run, and the next you’re on your way to meet a singer you first saw singing covers in his bedroom. And a mere 20 blocks from your apartment. He was very sweet, and very down to Earth, and if you’ve ever watched an interview—he really does laugh like that.

Want to learn more about Conor? There’s still too many people who aren’t familiar! Your best bet? Head to You Tube and listen to his cover of “Marvin’s Room” by Drake and then “Better than You” ft. Rita Ora from his new album #Contrast

@conormanyard #mayniacs

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m53tm7YXC71rxw29ho1_500.jpg

In Another Country

Thu, 13 Sep 2012 00:44:49 -0400

I have never been a religious person and I never will be. It’s not always easy either. Many times I have wished, and sometimes still do that my parents had raised me with some type of moral compass that pointed in the God direction. They didn’t.

I consider myself spiritual, but I do not believe in a religious figure that is concerned with human problems. People kill each other because they are crazy. You missed the train because it took you thirty more seconds than usual to leave your apartment this morning. He or she doesn’t love you because of something within them. God does not affect those things because those are human things.

Nine years ago yesterday when my Mom died, I would try and force myself to feel her. Like they do in movies, on breezes, or the beach or looking over a balcony with hair in your face. And I couldn’t. As I crossed Cumberland Ave. in West Lafayette, Indiana, I realized I had knowndeep within myself for a long time, that when you die, you die. You cease to exist likethe way you did before you were born. Walking down the street I knew that’s what I would always believe. But I wished it weren’t true. And based on history and civilization, that’s what humanity hopes isn’t true either.

It took me until I was in my twenties to find a place where I felt spiritual in the way I’d hoped to so many years ago. It’s in bookstores. Towards the end of my time at Ball State, I began to spend grocery money at Books A Million at the mall. Matt would call me to see where I was and I’d be at the book store. There’s a Barnes and Noble at 86th St. where I sacrifice my groceries now. I’m there so often I realized yesterday that they might recognize me if it weren’t for my constant hair dye jobs. In bookstores everything gets quiet. I pull things off the shelf. I say the alphabet in my head trying to find an author’s last name. I crouch down Indian-style on the floor to read something and forget I’m in the middle of the aisle. I go through an entire essay book by Hemingway searching for one line. “In the fall the war was always there, but we did not go to it any more.” I’d first read it when I was 15 in Mrs. Roadruck’s class, and I remember looking around the room at my classmates. Had everyone else just heard what I did? A first line like that? A single sentence that could evoke feelings so quickly? I imagine the way I felt at Shakespeare and Co. in Paris, upstairs walking amongst the wooden shelves that Fitzgerald and Joyce were near, is the way religious people feel when they pray. So I guess, as I write this, my parents did instill in me religion. My dad reading to me as a baby in his lap, poetry, and J. Alfred Prufrock before I was able to understand life in coffee spoons. When I would beg my mom to read the chapter where Charlotte dies again, just one more time, and she did.

This ninth year was harder than they have been in the past. I was tired in the afternoon and I laid down in my bed with the sunshine coming in the window. At 6:15 I went to dinner with Alison to celebrate my new job, a year at hers, a drink for my Mom, for Champ our imaginary bulldog. We sat outside at Cafeteria and drank cold glasses of Riesling and it was a good day again.

5 Things We Loved at Fashion's Night Out (Sept. 6, 2012)

Fri, 07 Sep 2012 13:48:56 -0400

Fashion’s Night Out is one of the best reasons to live in New York. Designers, stores and neighborhoods team together to celebrate everything that is fashion. From goody bags to great deals, to celebrity appearances and DJs in every store front, there’s plenty to love no matter what your style. Here’s some of the things we loved….

These glasses at Oliver Peoples.

Books as decor in Mulberry

The live bondage happening in the windows at Kiki de Montparnasse

Jason holding my favorite shoe at Kate Spade SOHO.

Conversational prints from Penguin’s Fall 2012 women’s line. Alison is wearing the floral conversation tie blouse, and I am wearing the b&w polka dot conversation shift dress. Alison’s red coat was her big fall splurge, with a slight peplum on the bottom and big gold buttons, it’s a conversation starter for sure.

What were your favorite moment’s from FNO? We’d love to hear them! newYorkInstant@gmail.com

Lastly, a FNO moment I’m sorry I missed:

Shameless Plug

Fri, 07 Sep 2012 13:31:48 -0400

So I’ve really needed my hair done. When I say really, I think you underestimated how dry, grown out, and tri (tri as in three) tonal it was. I got my first dark to light ombre in January and loved it, but it was in some dire need of an update. Thanks to Yukari at Dlala (Dah-lah) salon in Alphabet City, I am back to my regular, experimental self. I’ve had every color of the rainbow, but I’ve never had my hair colored quite like Yukari did it. She mixed all of my color by hand, creating color that didn’t come in a tube, and then hand painted (yes, HAND. PAINTED.) my entire head. She did not use the typical ombre technique of teasing the hair and dying over it, since while this works, it can damage the hair follicle. Yukari gave me a twenty minute consultation, went over color books with me, showed me how the cut would look prior to starting and then let me know every step of the way what she was doing. She gave me tips to maintain and moisturize in between visits, and put my hair through a conditioning treatment. Many of the products used at Dlala are Japanese, including the ear protectors (little shower caps made specifically to go over your ears, since any woman that colors knows dye loves to end up there). The salon is busy, bright and they do quality work! It was worth every penny, and the afternoon I spent at the salon being treated. Not to mention the massage after the cut and color was over. If you’re looking for a quality color job, head to Yukari at Dlala, you won’t be disappointed!

A Head Start and a Domestic Partnership

Wed, 05 Sep 2012 13:58:45 -0400

In case anyone was wondering, the fastest way to feel as though you and your same sex roommate are in a domestic partnership is to fill out a questionnaire about your lifestyle. As I was doing so last night, (for a number of various reasons), I realized the following: that Alison and I do indulge in an active weekend lifestyle, enjoy documentary television during the week (getting the lez vibe yet?) and have finally established a life here. Sure, it took a little over a year, but we have some roots down, and I can finally say here, are both gainfully employed.

Now that things have become official, I am happy to announce that I have found my first social work position and I am very excited to start! I have accepted an offer from the Children’s Aid Society, working in their early childhood/Head Start program. I will be enrolling families, performing intakes and home visits, offering individual counseling to families and parents as necessary, as well as supervising the small team of family workers at our agency. Head Start in NY state is moving towards a family immersed program, where the center is no longer on the child alone, but the entire family including parents and siblings. Parents are required to volunteer at our site, as well as attend workshops (which myself and the family workers put on), and engage readily with their children in order to receive the child care services. I am excited to be a part of these state-wide changes, and am one of the first Master’s social workers to be hired in the new supervisory role Children’s Aid has created (those of us hired are so new, that I am not even sure of what my formal title is!)

The commute to work will be somewhat lengthy, (although free, easy, and primo reading time) but there were too many positives for me to pay much attention to travel time. I have the honor of being included in the ground breaking changes happening with a national agency, and something that my mom was involved with too. In my initial interview, I was asked if I was familiar with Head Start, and I had to say yes. My mom spent many years advocating and researching for Head Start and child care programs around the country, and towards the end of her life, the Midwest. My first experience with low income families was sitting in the back seat of my mom’s Malibu (where I could spread out and sleep) and driving into the south side Chicago projects where children hung from fencing on the twentieth stories of their buildings. I’d never seen a world like that, and my mom ventured in bravely (and somewhat directionally challenged) to provide better child care for working mothers in these areas. To entice families to participate in her studies, my mom offered food and free child care (usually myself and a grad student.) I can still remember chasing a little boy with a caramel colored afro through a public library and into the elevator while he screamed. It’s a happy coincidence that I will be able to continue the legacy that my mom and her colleagues helped to create.

Hopefully I won’t have to run into any elevators with an afro.

Central Park.

Sun, 02 Sep 2012 17:39:39 -0400

Central Park.

Things You Only Learn in the City and From Reading Blogs

Wed, 29 Aug 2012 23:59:03 -0400

Maybe it’s watching all the new students at NYU that has me nostalgic, but I realized there’s a few things I’ve learned here in the ole city. This time last year I was a ball of nerves, preparing to enter into my year long grad program. Now that I have my Master’s there’s a possibility I’m smarter in two ways: professionally and this way-

Things That You Only Learn from Living in the City (And Because You Read This)

Subway seats are from the outside. If the bench is mostly empty, or there are a couple people sitting, you choose the seat next to either side railing or the pole in the middle. But never just the middle-even if it means putting space between you and another person. It makes it easier for everyone to fit if you just sit from the outside
Those “grip slips” on the side walk corners are the enemy (and oxymoron) of high heels. Walk around them.
The first two Metro Card scanners to the left or right of a row are almost always over used. New Yorkers hate cramming into middle spaces (see above). For that reason those scanners will usually say one thing: “Please Swipe Again.” Avoid.
If the numerical light on a taxi is not on, THE TAXI IS NOT AVAILABLE. You’d think this is obvious, but I consistently watch tourists none the wiser yell down the street, “C’mon! What the hell?” as the cab drives past. But on the weekends, taxi drivers are more selective of who they pick up. The wobbly, falling down, slightly green customers are less desirable candidates for a Puke Free cab ride, and therefore, if you are trying to get a ride home late at night from the spot, feel free to stick your hand out for any cabs driving by. As long as you look sober, you might get lucky.
If you stick a body part in closing subway doors, they will reopen. This is how most people stop doors from closing in order to avoid missing the train. But I said body parts, EX: arms, legs, feet, heads. I did not say purses, clothing items or sunglasses. The train will rip your dress off. Or, as I observed an Asian woman learning, leave the station with the paper documents she stuck between the closing doors securely between them while she remained on the platform. Hope it wasn’t her Last Will and Testament.
Whistling doesn’t help you hail a cab. Only people in movies do that. Or people who get told to “fuck off” by nearby patrons on the street.
You can’t split a check in New York. What I mean is, they’re not going to charge you for just what you ordered. I don’t know why, but no restaurants do it. They can literally split the check, and in as many ways as you want. Yes, I understand that this is probably just as hard as charging us all what we ordered. But it ain’t guna happen. And being the person who insists on paying for only what they ordered is really dragging down the whole social experience. Split it, let someone by you a drink and give it a few months. You’ll get used to it.
You can’t find a job here in a couple weeks. This is Manhattan, not the Rest of the World Minus California.
The nicer the weather, the worst the tourist trap. I reminded myself of this the hard way on a recent shopping trip to SOHO. The sky was blue, the sun was peeking behind clouds, and I was barking at the ninth tourist in my path to EXCUSE ME. (Later I did feel bad.) It’s better to pick off times to go these areas, say before noon or after five. Tourists suck, but let’s not get crazy here, shopping in the rain sucks.
If I were a man standing at the MITS (public bus) station in Muncie, Indiana and I saw a man and a woman screaming at each other, and feared it might turn violent I might intervene. Alas I am a woman, a woman who sadly sees this all too often in NY. Fights escalating to scary levels, weird shit at the train station. The other sad thing is this is NY. Involving yourself in a situation in the city allows for even more unknowns. Not that crazy stuff doesn’t happen in IN, but there’s just a difference. Best thing to do is stay out of it, or alert the authorities if you feel it is necessary. Every where else, saving someone gets you a medal. In NY, it gets me and the rest of the train passengers looking at you like you’re crazy (and definitely NOT sticking a body part in the train doors to wait for you.)
Puddles of water that are next to buildings, poles, tree fences (like the ones on the UES) or are trickling away from a building/or a corner are pee. Water droplets falling on top of you (even during a clear day) are sweating AC units. Puddles in the middle of the sidewalk aren’t pee, but probably a discarded drink or construction run off. The murky puddles off of curbs the day after it’s rained? Toxic sludge. Better to walk in the pee.
If the traffic signal says don’t walk, look to see if there are cars coming, if there aren’t: walk. If there are, but they are in the distance: walk. If the care is close, but has it’s blinker on (not coming down the street you want to cross): walk. The cars are bumper to bumper despite the green light and won’t move in the thirty seconds it takes you to cross the street: walk. The light is turning yellow and the cabs are starting to stop: walk. Leaving the Park at 5th Avenue on the UES: walk (it takes cars an unnatural amount of time to reach lights here for some reason). A driver motions for you to cross the street: walk. If the traffic signal is blinking: walk. If the traffic signal was blinking but just stopped, check the light, if it isn’t red: walk. If the traffic signal says walk: walk.
You will start to recognize the homeless residents, train beggars and weirdos in your neighborhood. They will become endearing to you. You will never give them money.
Remember when you didn’t live in Manhattan and your front door automatically came with a lock? Locks aren’t garuanteed. You might get one in the door handle, but any criminal looking to steal our 8-in TV or sexually exploit us is kicking that baby in in a jiff. Here in NYC, one must spend hundreds of dollars on a secure lock for the front door, and then find a place to put it, since all the stripped locks of former tenants are attached to your door. Out of door space? TIme to sell all your valuables. And remind yourself that Manhattan has truly found a way to make money from absolutely everything.
If the building is just so-so, it is likely that the doorman doesn’t care who you’re here to “visit.” So proceed on to your booty call with the vomit in your hair and the scuff marks on your knees, the doorman is taking pity on you. If the building is very nice, the doorman cares. Excuse me, ma’m, who are you here to see? I’ll call up.
Walking through the Park at night is asking for rapists and pick pockets to come and claim you. But walking through the West/East cross town road is safe. The sidewalks are too narrow and full of puddles for any criminal to get any true work done there.
The delivery men on bicycles do not have to stop when cars do. If you’re using the walking tips above, beware of delivery bikes.
Yes it’s just as much fun living in Manhattan as you think it would be. Yes it’s just as much a pain in the ass living in Manhattan as you think it would be. Yes there’s more stuff to do/eat/see/experience here than almost anywhere else so yes I think I have it better than you do.

If there are NY things I have not listed here, it is because I have yet to learn them, or forgot. Feel no shame in reminding me, at NewYorkInstant@gmail.com

That photo is Central Park in June, taken by muah. Share with credit!

gofuckingnuts: F u c k t i 0 n on We Heart It....

Wed, 01 Aug 2012 19:23:22 -0400

gofuckingnuts:

F u c k t i 0 n on We Heart It. http://weheartit.com/entry/33852468

Turkey Meatballs for Poor People

Mon, 30 Jul 2012 20:05:27 -0400

It’s been awhile since we’ve uploaded a recipe to the blog. Thought we’d hit you with two of our favorites, one new (this one) and an old favorite (to be posted soon!) We always substitute ground turkey for hamburger around here, it’s leaner and has (what I think) is a more complex flavor. And that annoying/gross grease that you have to deal with when you’re cooking with ground beef? Say sigh-oh-nara! (I could Google the correct spelling of that, but I am too excited to share this with you.)

I had a big craving for spaghetti and meatballs, and decided to whip up something with what we had in the house. These are seriously the easiest meatballs that you will probably ever make, and they have great flavor! These are slightly spicy (we’ll show you how to remedy that if that’s not your thing), the turkey tastes a little bit like sausage, and because they’re lean ground meat and baked, they’re much lower in fat than your traditional counterparts, but trust us—you won’t notice that in the flavor!

What you’ll need:

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 tsp celery salt (if you don’t have this, make it 1/4 tsp of salt)

1/4 tsp pepper

1/4 tsp red pepper chili flakes (Eliminate this if you don’t want a little heat!)

(1/4 tsp of Oregano would also be great, we just didn’t have any on hand. They’ll still taste great without, but if you have some, throw it in!)

4 tbsp of All Whites egg whites (in the carton) (If you don’t have this, one egg)

1/4 cup Italian breadcrumbs

1 clove minced garlic

ground lean turkey

baking sheet/non-stick spray/mixing bowl/whisk (or a fork)

Directions:

1. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees and spray your baking sheet with non-stick spray, set aside. If you’re making pasta, now is a good time to salt your pasta water and set on medium heat to boil

2. Mix your dry ingredients together in a bowl and whisk together

3. Add egg to dry ingredients, but DON’T mix it up!

4. Add turkey. I used about 3/4 of a half pound package

5. Mush it around with your hands, making sure to not leave any of the dry ingredients sticking to the bowl

6. Roll the turkey mixture into balls and align on a baking sheet like such…

If you’re making the meatballs ahead of time, and aren’t ready to cook them, they’ll be good like this in the fridge for a few hours. Otherwise-

7. Put the meatballs in the oven for approximately 22 minutes (a little less, a little more won’t hurt them.) In fact, Alison was running late on her way home from work today and I left them to warm at 200 degrees in the oven and they were still A-Okay

8. Don’t forget to throw in your pasta! If you want to coordinate cooking times, add the pasta to the water after ten minutes of meatball cooking time. If you’re in 5A, you’re eating whole wheat pasta. Don’t listen to anyone who says this stuff doesn’t cook the same as regular, it does. And the taste is a little nuttier, and it’s a WHOLE lot better for you! As you can see from the picture, I used a canned sauce (for you NY-ers, Renaldi, 1.99 at most Gristedes) and dressed it up with my favorite additions: Red chili flakes, pepper and a tbs. and half of Chavrie goat cheese, whisked in. We always have goat cheese in the house and I love it to dress up a store bought sauce. You can start to warm the sauce around the same time you put the pasta in the water.

9. After twenty-two minutes, tending to your sauce and draining your pasta, pull out those meatballs and use a knife to check for doneness. Juices should run clear and there should be no pink in the middle! They will be lighter in color than hamburger meatballs, see below.

(Yea that’s a pot top that doesn’t fit, such is the NY life.)

10. Put all the stuff together and leave the clean up for someone else!

***Substitute the pasta for toothpicks, and you’ve got a great appetizer for a party (use the sauce as a dipping sauce! And perhaps adjust the size of the meatballs. If you make them smaller than seen here, make sure and check them at 15 mins so you don’t make hockey pucks!)

We’ll have another poor person recipe up soon! Did you try this and like it? How did your meatballs turn out? NewYorkInstant@gmail.com